"My Real Mom!"

ahhh, Return to Oz, how you amuse me with you crappy acting and scary talking rocks.

so it's like 4:30 in the morning right now, and i can't sleep. my stomach's all tense and i have that "hey you're gonna throw up" feeling in my throat. jeez. i think it was that fast food mom got us last night... the kind she got is almost guaranteed to screw me over. ugh.

ffff i can't believe it's only tuesday. i want school to be DONE with. fgsfdfg

tristan wants to hold a mini-LARP. we were discussing it yesterday when he was over, and decided we would do it in his ginormous backyard. i also get to be a half-demon hur hur.
he also filed my nails on one hand into little claws and painted them blood red. they look so cool, lol. but i have to be careful when i scratch my arms/shoulders because they rip my skin easy.

so, my nightmares are getting a bit worse. they're going from paranoia factor - scared that something is going to get me - to shock and paranoia - scared something's gonna get me AND there's really horrible images.
the other night, i had a dream that vampire lady gave me an ultimatum, where she could either kill me or put me in this room where three ladies were taking acid showers and screaming and their bodies were decaying, and one lady had a huge bruise on her face, and all i remember about her is her screaming really loud and horribly.
gee, aren't nightmares just sons'a bitches?

been listening to lots of Goth music lately - mostly Vitamin String Quartet and Voltaire. as i type this, I have "Raven's Land" by Voltaire playing. it's a very nice song, very mesmerizing.

man, i don't want to go to school today. fffuck..

fortunately, i haven't had a dream about kyo in like... a few days? i think so. that's good, i was getting really super tired of those.
what's funny is, i always had dreams about her talking to me, but when I woke up to go see if any of it was true, it wasn't.
but the other day i had a dream that me and my friend were arguing, and i figured, "oh these dreams never come true, that was all just a fail"
ssuuuuurre enough. it wasn't exactly an argument, but it was... uncomfortable.


i really wish my sides would stop hurting. last night my entire right side of my upper body was throbbing with pain, from my ribs up to my shoulder, and right now it's my left side. stupid body.

oh... god i keep having throw-up scares. damn it.

stupid prosnier. i hate my english teacher. i hate my biology teacher too, he's a fag.

these fucking body cramps are annoying.

aaaaaaaaaaaaand here come the emo thoughts. hey guys, what took you so long? i've been awake for about two hours now.

i went and looked back at this letter a person made for me about a year or so ago... it was cute. i miss him.


also, i'm moving this weekend. internet will probably be wtf in a few days. that is, if anybody really wants to talk to me, lolol

i don't think i have anything else to rant about... hmm. i'm done here, then. adios.